What Grownups Do
by NicP
Summary: Abed makes a move on Annie and Jeff loses something he didn't realize he wanted.


Jeff sat starring at his phone. Britta was reading some indie local paper. Pierce had just said something vaguely racist and Shirley had rolled her eyes as if to warn him against further indiscretion. They were supposed to be studying but no one's heart was in it. Annie would carry the group, as she had in the past, and besides…the semester was just about over. Jeff glanced over at Annie as she brushed her hair out of her face and continued reading. Poor kid. It was obvious she was still hung up on him. That little dance she had done had certainly proved that, but hey, he'd seen quite a few women dance in a sexy santa suit before…

"Hello everyone." Abed said as he walked into the study room and set his books on the table. Rather than sit, Abed remained standing and waited for everyone's attention. It took a few seconds before the group realized that he had not sat down and looked at him inquisitively.

"Is this about Kick-Puncher?" Cuz boy I am not watching one more minute of that show…no matter how many of my mini-pies you graciously eat…" Shirley said as she looked up from her crossword.

" No. No. Sadly…Funding for Kick-Puncher 3 has been temporarily held up…However, I do expect my letter writing campaign to help grease the wheels." Abe said matter of factly.

"Actually, I have something not television related to share with the group- If I may have your attention." Abed stood straight as everyone turned…vaguely interested.

"Annie."

"Yes?" She looked up- surprised to be specifically addressed and concerned that she would be called out for her previous accidentally destruction of Abed's valuable dvd.

"Recent events, such as your kindness after destroying my DVD and that santa costume you wore when we sang that duet have gotten me thinking…" Woah…Jeff looked up from him phone. Annie had worn that santa dress for Abed too? They sang a duet? He thought..wait…

"You are a beautiful woman. You are intelligent, kind and ambitious. You enjoy Inspector Spacetime and make an excellent breakfast. We kissed last year. You found me attractive both as Han Solo and Don Draper. I have found you attractive on several occasions and believe any children that we might have in the future would be both intelligent and aesthetically pleasing." Annie was now sitting straight up in her chair. Her mouth was forming a small "o" and a flush was beginning to travel up her body. Jeff gave a crooked look. Could he be serious? This was just plain embarrassing. Laying it out on the table like that-just saying how he feels – in front of everyone. Forget the fact that Annie was gonna shut him down any second. Forget the fact the fact that Abed was a weird, eccentric little nut who could never ever score a girl like Annie…he was asking Annie out…in front of everyone.

"In our short time living together, I have found you to be delightful company and a wonderful addition to our home."

"I second that." Troy said as he and Abed airfived.

"However, I see that any romantic relationship is fraught with difficulties for both Troy and the group as a whole. I feel sneaking around and causing unnecessary drama is beneath us, so it seemed appropriate that I air my feelings in a group setting as to allow for proper discussion." It was weird. For someone who rarely operated in the real word, Abed was actually the most mature amongst them. He wasn't stealing kisses or glances. He wasn't filling her head with lies or trying to get in her pants. He was genuinely standing before Annie…and all of their friends, asking for a date. The group was silent for second. Jeff was happily waiting the moment when the group would erupt into yelling about Abed being a perv an Annie once again causing trouble.

"Well…I think this is so romantic! A REAL gentlemen!" Shirley squealed.

"I concur! What confidence! Congratulations son." Pierce smiled. Annie sat in silence while the group continued to discuss her life. She glanced at Jeff and for a moment she did not recognize what he was trying to convey. He laughed and shook his head.

"This makes sense. Psychologically, Annie and Abed are a perfect match. Intelligent. Offbeat. Their profiles make them well suited for one another." Jeff had heard enough. This drama bullshit had gone far enough. Why can't they ever just be a study group? And what was Abed's problem, didn't he know that Annie was –

"So, we have the group's approval. I am a few years older than you and we live together already. There could be some complications, but I like you Annie. I think you like me. In conclusion, would you like to attempt to like one another?" Heads turned quickly from Abed to Annie as they all waited on baited breath for her response. Before Annie could respond, Jeff cut in.

"This is ridiculous! Abed, Annie does not want to date you. You are making a scene and now we are going to have another weird weak of awkward stares and uncomfortable silences."

"No we aren't." Annie said and we rose from her seat. She walked towards Abed and smiled warmly.

"I do like you. I like Han Solo you and Don Draper you and claymation Christmas you. Yes. We should…defiantly date." Annie jumped a little and gave a giggle as if reassuring herself. Troy shrieked with joy as Shirley, Britta, Abed, and Pierce clapped.

"Don't just stand there man! Kiss the girl!" Pierce said. Jeff quickly rose and stood between the two.

"No, don't kiss the girl! Look! This isn't a tv show. This is real life and…you are a weird, creepy little guy! And Annie is…Me and Annie are… She isn't dating you." Jeff's temper flared as the group seemed taken aback. Abed looked wounded…sad even. He slouched and looked at his shoes.

A rage grew in Annie's eyes…Something that Jeff had never seen before. No one had ever seen it.

"You shut up!" She said as she waved her finger in his face.

"He was sweet and smart and mature…and you have no right even involving yourself in this conversation! "

"Annie…I …what about you and me" He grabbed her elbow and pulled her in towards him.

"This is not where we want to discuss this…' He whispered to her.

"NO! No! There is no us! There is no discussion." She said sharply.

"I'm sorry Jeff..but this isn't your decision. This really…You don't get to play with people. You don't get to put people on layaway for when you decide there is an …us. You know what Jeff…and take a second to absorb this… I don't want YOU! YOU SUCK! You are pretensions! And, arrogant…and you know what? No one likes your stupid hair. I DON'T WANT YOU!" Annie was screaming by the time she was done.

"Ouch…" Whispered Troy as the rest of the group looked on.

"Abed, would you like to go get dinner with me?" Annie asked as she turned to face Abed.

"I…I really would like that a lot. I have already prepared a list of places and put them in order based on a rating I compiled by factoring in location, ambiance, and meal quality."

"Perfect." Annie smiled before taking his arm and accompanying him out of his room.

The days following the dramatic start of Annie and Abed's relationship had been hard for Jeff. He had come off like a real dick. He had lost his cool in front of his friends. And worst of all…Annie was with Abed. It wasn't that he loved her. He didn't think he did. It was that…she had been his. His to date or not date. His to kiss suddenly every couple of weeks. His to lead on. His to …smell her hair, copy her answers, his to fight with and dance with and piss off every once in a while. She wasn't his anymore. She was…well not his. He should have seen this coming. If he wanted Annie back…he was gonna have to set things right. He was gonna have to get her back.

Abed was reading a comic book in the library when Jeff approached him.

"Dude."

"Dude." Jeff sat next to his friends.

"What you did wasn't cool? You know Annie and I had a thing…." Jeff admitted. Abed took a breath.

"I did know that."

"And you knew she and I …."

"I knew you liked Annie…"

"DUDE, so why did you ask her out?" Jeff asked incredulously.

"You liked Annie…You two might have continued making googly eyes at one another until one day you made a mistake and slept together. She would be devastated and you would take off on her. Jeff, you like Annie. I. love. Her." A silence hung in the air.

"You?"

"I love Annie. I'll take care of her. I'll treat her well, never make her cry, never take her for granted. You may leave here and be a lawyer again. You may make more money than me and have more experience than me, but I'm a better guy than you and I deserve Annie."

"Well, what if I love her too?" Jeff asked aloud. Did he love her? He honestly didn't know. He hadn't thought of her that way. He hadn't thought anything really. Just that…well, he liked her fawning over him. He liked the way she smiled and how her face wrinkled when she was thinking.

"You don't. "

"Dammit Abed! I would have asked her out eventually!" Abed got up to leave.

"Jeff, I love Annie…and I'm pretty sure she loves me. You had a chance. You blew it. That's life. God…grow up, would ya?"


End file.
